God, Don’t give me peace…

This has been a weird week as I have settled back into my job and home life. It is difficult to carry on the routines of normal life when it feels like a big part of my life has been stripped away and my thoughts are constantly with Scott and Bryce. However, this is the way it has to be. Diapers must be changed, meals must be cooked, and paychecks must be earned. However, as I operate my life with a knife stuck in my heart in many ways I am thankful for the blade. My wound keeps sending me to Christ. I don’t want things to get back to the way they were. I want to love my wife and kids more than ever. I want to watch TV less and seek God more. I want to serve my wonderful church more faithfully. Most of all I want more of Christ. I do not want time to heal this wound. Nor do I want to dull the ache with the TV or Internet. I don’t even want to find refuge by just busying myself with family time. I want my refuge to be in Christ and Christ alone. If he does not give me peace, then I don’t want peace.

Don't Just Do Something Stand There...

This was the title to Dr. Albert Mohler's first sermon in chapel at Southern Seminary (the seminary I attended in Louisville, Kentucky)Sometimes we need people to just stand, and not just do.

I wanted to point out that a number of people have just "stood there" with Scott. There have been many people who have just been around Scott during this time, and I appreciate them, I know he does as well.

I didn't realize that Scott was going to publish something at the same time I posted so be sure and go down a couple posts and read his note.

Fight FOCA!

For those who don't know the Freedom of Choice Act is a piece of legislation that will undo years of "pro-life" legislation.

Copied from Between Two Worlds Blog:
FOCA will eradicate state and federal laws that the majority of Americans support, such as:

* Bans on Partial Birth Abortion
* Requirements that women be given information about the risks of getting an abortion
* Only licensed physicians can perform abortions
* Parents must be informed and give consent to their minor daughter's abortion

FOCA would erase these laws and prevent states from enacting similar protective measures in the future.

To sign the petition go here.

Thank You by Scott

I want to thank everyone for the love that has been shown to my family over the past two weeks. God has poured out his grace on us through our friends. I especially want to thank Wyatt Baptist Church for being the hands and feet of God throughout this process. They have reached out to us through prayers, phone calls, visits, food, housework, and so many other ways.

I also want to thank Jonathan for setting up and maintaining this blog. So many people from other states (and nations) have told me that they have been able to keep up with everything because of his hard work. Thank you Jonathan!

I can't say enough about how wonderful Jill was. She was the greatest minister I have ever known. I always loved to watch her pour into other young ladies. She had a passion for helping others grow in Christ because she had a passion for growing in Christ herself. Her greatest joy was truly in her Savior and Lord.

Beyond ministering to others, she constantly ministered to me. She was always there to keep me organized, help me with church projects, plan mission trips, communicate with people on my behalf, tend to my diabetes, organize information, and give me feedback on my ministry.

And at the end of the day, she loved me in spite of myself. I was truly blessed with the most wonderful, beautiful, gracious wife! She was a godly woman in every way.

One of my favorite memories of Jill is watching her take care of Bryce. She found great fulfillment in being a mom. After so many years of praying for a baby, God blessed us with an sweet little boy.

I loved watching her talk to him, recite scripture to him, read books to him, snuggle with him, take a million pictures of him, and make plans for him. Every night before we would put him to bed, Jill would swaddle him and lay him down between us. We would all snuggle together and talk about how we were a "snuggling family." Those were some of the best "family moments" I have ever had.

There are a million other things I could say about Jill. It has been encouraging over the past two weeks to learn of all the people she ministered to that I never knew about. I think it is safe to say that she did 100 years of ministry in her 34 years on earth! I love her and miss her greatly.

To everyone who has sent emails and posted on this blog -thank you for sharing your memories and feelings for Jill. It means so much to me.

New Features on the Blog

I wish this would have been on here before, but I just put a counter on the blog and an analytics code so that I can see where people are accessing the blog from. I also added an RSS feed activator on the right to make it easier for those of you savvy enough to get our blog that way.

By the way, I have my personal journal within the same blogger account so if I ever post one of my personal journals on here I cannot be held ultimately responsible for the content, because I have no filter when writing in it. It is a very unrestricted and free form, kind of like how you can't be held responsible for the content of your dreams. Whatever flows into my head gets written down.

You'll know immediately if I accidentally post one on here though.

Don't Waste Your Life...

Jill did not waste hers. I really need to go back and count up all the women who have emailed or commented about how Jill discipled or otherwise poured her life into them. There have been dozens. Oh to leave a legacy like she has in her short life! She may have had only one biological son, but she has a quiver full of spiritual daughters.

I want to speak to older women reading this: what will your legacy be? For some of you, it may seem too late to leave a legacy like Jill, and you may be right. But it is never too late to begin to leave a legacy. Perhaps you yourself need to be discipled, seek out another lady to disciple you so that you can disciple others.

Young ladies: What will your legacy be? You have youth on your side, but as we have seen, youth is no guarantee of longevity. You may think you have time to build a legacy later, but you may not. If you need discipling find an older lady who can pour her life into you, and then seek to disciple others.

Jill lived like eternity was just around the corner, may we all live like that and not waste our lives.

The book at the top of the screen is a book about not wasting your life by John Piper.
You can buy it here.

Job... Again

I will be preaching Job 1:1-2:10 on Sunday night at Wyatt.

For a good sermon on this text go here.

Church Leadership

I love the way our church has "stepped up" in the temporary absence of our pastor. Scott has taught tirelessly that one of his main purposes is to prepare the church body to minister, and not just to minister to us (though he has done that very well). I went to SAU today and ate lunch to be greeted by about a dozen from our church who went to an International Student Activity.

I have heard other stories of our deacons selflessly ministering to others (this is no surprise of course.) We have a basketball ministry on Monday nights and I heard last night's meeting was great. I look forward to publishing a report from what happened in the near future.

I am so proud to be a part of Wyatt Baptist Church. We have a very unique and very biblical church structure. Instead of having a "pastor-as-CEO" model, we have a group of men who lead the church as pastors. We are going to be able to fill the pulpit with men who are at the church, and won't be dependent on pulpit supply.

Our situation shows how important having a biblical model for church leadership really is. Many times when one man decides the vision, teaching and overall direction, the church becomes unhealthily dependent on one man. If he leaves, the whole structure falls apart, and then the church will be at the mercy of the next pastor's vision, teaching and direction. If you have a group of godly men who have "one mind" on the vision, teaching and direction that the church ought to see, believe and go, then the displacement of a pastor does not affect the direction of the church because there are others to pick up where the displaced pastor left off.

I wish more churches would adopt this biblical model for church leadership. This along with other biblical mandates for the church are found in the book displayed at the top of this page- Nine Marks of a Healthy Church by Mark Dever. It's amazing that in addition to it being biblical it is also very practical...go figure.

Scott Attebery

Below, Tyra made this comment:
"Scott has to be the most special, dear man to have won the heart of Jill Jarvis!"
Truer words were never spoken. Scott is an invaluable gift to me, my family, and our church. He is probably the most gifted person that I know personally, and I know some really awesome people. I can't tell you how much he has ministered to me these past 3 years since we have been at Wyatt.
We have spent probably 130 Sunday afternoons at their home after church. When we began to go to Wyatt, Scott and Jill invited us to stay at their house since the drive back to Magnolia was so long (and gas was so high!).
Scott and Jill are such a great example of a wonderful marriage. They were crazy about each other, and that was evident. We spent a lot of time around them, and if they were just putting on, I think we would have been able to detect it. We didn't detect anything except that they had a wonderfully uncommon union.
Scott is an indefatigable defender of truth. His love for God has been an inspiration to me to love God more. I've never known someone who was so much the same in the pulpit and out. If you know him, you know what I'm talking about. He doesn't put on a "preacher persona" and transform into a pulpiteer when he steps into that space, he's just Scott. That kind of consistency has been a breath of fresh air to me.
Another reason that I love Scott so much is because he won't like that I even took the time to write this. He probably thinks my time is better spent trying to minister to others. Well, that is what I'm doing. The more people know you, Jill and our God, the better served they will be. I love it that there is no difference between telling people about you and Jill, and ministering to them. Telling them about you ministers, because that's what you are about. Kind of like (this is a very imperfect analogy) there is no inconsistency between glorifying God and enjoying Him.
I give thanks to God for Scott, and am very hopeful for what God has in store for him and all of us who have been so affected by his and Jill's life.

529 Instructions for Those Who Contribute

For those who have or will contribute to Bryce's 529 account, please send a note to Wyatt Baptist Church telling who you are and how much you contributed. The Gift Plan does not automatically notify anyone about who gives what as far as I know. Thanks, Jonathan